It’s High Time We Pull Our Head’s Out of Our Butt’s

Today is a big day for our country, and the world itself.No, world peace has not been reached. (Somewhere out there the current Miss America is silently crying) And sadly we still cannot turn on a red light in front of my neighborhood. Something bigger than that happened today:

The first pictures of the two leads in the Fifty Shades of Grey movie have been released to the all-consuming masses. (Please pause here to let out an audible scream/shriek of some kind)

Photo Credit: Amazon

Photo Credit: Amazon

While you may not be inclined to admit you read these books, (though I’m not entirely sure why…) God knows almost every person in the free world could probably tell you something about this book series. Be honest, whether or not you read these books, you have an opinion of some kind on them and the movie.

Now if you are not that familiar with me, you may not know where I lie on the spectrum of Fifty Shades fans. Let’s just say judging by the number of people who posted on my Facebook wall, combined with the number of people who texted me about the pictures today, it’s safe to say I have a “slight” obsession/love and hate relationship with these books. (And it’s definitely more love than hate!)

So, since I am sure you are all dying to know what I think about the casting choices, and the newest pictures of Christian and Ana, I will fulfill your greatest wish. Lucky you. Today is your day.

Let’s start with what I love: (Be warned this list will be longer than what I don’t like)

  • The overall look of Jamie Dornan and Dakota Johnson. These actors look very close to what I (notice I say I) pictured in my head when reading these books. I will also take a tiny leap of faith in saying that they fit the general description of the characters.
  • Jamie Dornan. For those of you who haven’t seen Jamie Dornan and his acting skills, be prepared for him to blow your socks off. I know him from the T.V. Show Once Upon a Time, and he was spectacular on there. He also has the look of a tall, dark, and handsome guy who will be unbelievably sweet one moment, but in a flash can turn to the red side. (And yes, red was used for a reason in that sentence)
  • Dakota Johnson. Dakota Johnson has a lot going for her. She is rather unknown to the mass public, which is what was needed for Ana’s character. Her physical appearance is also spot on for Ana. She is tallish, dyed her hair to brown (as if they’d really leave it her natural blonde people), and she is very striking in a subdued way. Definition of Ana. Period.
  • What they’re wearing. I cannot begin to describe how much I love the clothing they chose for these pictures. I think I will have the mental image of Jamie Dornan in a suit ingrained in my head for quite a while. Am I also the only one who noticed that the dress Dakota/Ana is wearing is plum colored? Cough Cough, that is a dress used majorly in the book. THAT IS ATTENTION TO DETAILS PEOPLE! (That is clearly a very good sign!)
  • Their chemistry. They have not begun shooting this movie yet, so no one really knows the extent of chemistry these actors have, but looking at them in these pictures gives me an exorbitant amount of hope.

    Photo Credit: Entertainment Weekly

    Photo Credit: Entertainment Weekly

Now for the things that aren’t exactly my favorite:

  • Dakota Johnson looks a little older than 22 in these pictures. In real life, Dakota Johnson is 24. She definitely looks older than that, but that’s probably because she’s not like most females in Hollywood at her age, and actually has her crap together. This isn’t honestly a big issue for me because she still looks younger than her costar, and let’s be honest about how many actors/actresses have played people significantly younger than their actual ages. (Feel free to insert the name of any “teen” show or movie here.)
  • They need to get their thumbs away from their mouths. ASAP.  I know what you’re all thinking, nothing makes me like a person more than them posing with their thumb near their mouth. As if. This isn’t an ad for thumb suckers anonymous, so do us all a favor and put your hands/thumbs/and various other appendages on each other and not your mouths. Please and thank you.
  • Jamie Dornan needs to be a smidge more scruffier. I’m not saying he should look like he’s on the last day of No Shave November, but a little more five o’clock shadow could go a long way. And it’ll make his appeal sky-rocket even more. Believe me, girls tend to like a little scruff.

So there you have it. My brief, albeit essential opinion of these actors and their first pictures as these characters. Before I depart a few simple side notes:

  • These are their first pictures as the characters, so given them an f*%$ing break. This isn’t the be all end all of the movie. This is step one of like a thousand. Be patient, more will come in time.
  • You may have had a specific mental picture for these characters, but news flash, the production company can’t read your mind. And if they make it perfect for you, it ain’t gonna be perfect for someone else. Get. Over. It.
  • Admit it to the world already that you read these books, and are going to see the movie. They are not that bad, and it is okay for you to like them, have an opinion on them, and even pay money to buy the books and see the movie. If we can all get over all the other horrible crap that’s happened in this world, we can surely get over the fact that you spent $12 to buy a book about love and BDSM.
  • When it comes to ANY adaptation of a book, crap will be different. That is the bottom line; accept it. It is time to get over what will and could be different. We all know you can’t have everything. The production company, director, actors, and the damn author are doing their darndest to make this movie for you. Be grateful. They’re only trying to please us.

Thus, it is high time we all pull our heads out of our butts, and realize that this movie has the makings to be fantastic. (Even if you don’t want to admit it.) Sure they have a lot of aspects they need to get right for this movie to impress us, but they are on definitely on the right track.

So let’s all do ourselves a favor: take a deep breath, pull our heads out of our butts, and put our big girl panties on. This is the real thing people, and love it or hate it, it is here to stay.

p.s. I will also be accepting a monetary donation from those people who HATE the actors and choices now, but in a year and a half will be praising the movie to everyone they know. You know you’re out there, so start saving your pennies now. My piggy bank is ready.

Update: See the Official Fifty Shades of Grey trailer below! Can I tell you how flipping excited I am to see this movie?!

It should also be noted that I’ve officially watched this trailer more times than is probably necessary, but I am still sold on this cast and movie, and I hope y’all are too!